in the end i was still hardly to accept the fact, no matter is the fact of a general one or more in to detail one, i still had a feel of being fooled? perhaps not that serious, but i cant find a word to fully describe it. Everyone said when you are in the trap you will never know you are trapped; and i was fully experienced this. If one asked, would you like the delete the memory permanently? my answer was: NO. Although it was not a good one, but before it turns bad, the good one was too good to be true, and the feel of having it was really replenished my dull and boring life. And at that time of having this answer, i was still baring the hard feeling of it, and count to the matter that i assumed it supposed should not happened.
Odd things happens all the time. what i assumed it should not happen, it happened. From the beginning what i analyzed was wrong, what i predicted and what i believed was wrong, all wrong form the beginning till the end. what disappointed me the most were: he never face the problem. Fine of giving a fake hope, I've predicted the ending of this day once i allowed it happen, but not a ending like escaping lo.
there was a gathering at mooncake festival, a sophisticated man awaken me. And he told a frightening news of me that im in a negative magnetic field, which meansn im more likely to see them. the grad old man said i was confusing and not concentrating, should be more focus to raise the negativity to positivity.
erm, really... samsook had his points, and his point awaken me. this few days my mind is more peaceful and calm, which i didn't have in the past few months, at least, i dont think of his face , his name, his joke, his word once i opened my eye......
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1 comment:
Glad that u've managed to find peace and calm.. It's never easy going through what u had to undergo, but like I promised u in the end; you're one tough cookie =) don't give urself a limit or reason to avoid or try too hard to forget :) it's part of u growing up.. + u + u! Have faith =)
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