What wear you down is not the choice you made but the choice you don't make.

what is the time now? 0109. I suppose to go to bed by now, as tomorrow need to wake up by 6, as normal. hmpf...I'm a working adult already.

I don't feel to complain how tough the job is; anyway, whose job is easy? By all means, by hook by crook, do first think after in a smart way. It is all right to have talking/ presentation/ pitching all the time, but I hate the part of doing research... I'm asking myself this question again and again, which job offers you such an opportunity of earning a maximum figure and yet that is within your capability? Visualizing life years later, not luxury but at least above average. If Doraemon do me a favor,  I'd request a machine to send me to 2 years later (with my decision of staying back in this company); it is silly, ain't it? 2 years wasted because of I don't want to face the cruelty of real life; why not i ask a courage medicine from Doraemon? *shake head*

I was looking at photos few months ago; watching clips of few months ago; watching clips in facebook which also took few months ago. I'm regret I didn't fully enjoy just because of a small matter of broke up; I'm regret and self-blaming of influenced by this matter, and hence result....*shake head, again*. When i look into photos with xiang, I regret why should I had insisted on the matter so long; it should be a precious moment, 3 months time of being together with xiang. *turn my head aside* but if without his cruelness, I won't even have a better candidate(haha! you are candidate). Thank you, to both of you.

Facebook becomes a channel to share things and gather; our clips are always being edited and posted. Every time watching is like memory tape rewind. The scene which we sang at Everton Park; the scene which we drove to Scottland; the scene which we played 'Hide and Seek' in kitchen with limited space; the scene which we watched strip show; the scene which we club; the scene which we're doing grocery shopping;  the scene which we sing K in my room; the scene which we discussing tomorrow's exam; the scene which we drunk and cried..because that was the last day of our study life....
Now i particularly miss the scene when we watched Meteor star in 11 Celsius night; the scene when we smoke at Everton Park when i was in sadness; the scene when we were at Cheshire Oak; the scene when we're discussing assignment that made me almost cry; the scene when we're arguing on certain issue; the scene when we drink Strongbow in room; the scene when I was meowing in your window; the scene when we buying stuffs for Europe trip...

What had past, it's past. It's been 4 months, it will be one year soon. Yes, i hate doing research, but time past with 'tic-tock-tic-tock' only. You don't catch means it tic-tocks away; you caught it at least it might be something hold in hand.

Remember I said tough doesn't mean face all problems alone without relying someone, but stand up and re-face? I need people by my side.Oh, maybe edge of toughness is being smoothen or soften, I feel like I'm not as tough as before?  Remember I said I don't force myself to be a tough one by measure my "toughness" with tears? So when I was typing scenes that we've gone through, my eye balls were moisturized...